I normally try not to do emotional posts as I don't want this blog to become an emo blog and therefore scare off all of you readers out there, but I really think I need to vent.
So, I met this boy a few months ago at an 18th. He's not the typical "hot indie boy that wears Vans and skinny jeans" type that I normally go for, but his personality definitely makes up for it. I like everything about him.. He plays football (and is amazing at it), has dimples, plays the guitar, has great taste in music, is cute, is funny and wears Vans! It wasn't "love at first sight", but I definitely had a thing for him as soon as we met. Anyway, blah blah blah shit happened and I'm not sure if it was love, but it was definitely something fucking strong. Basically things didn't work out in the end because he's a complicated fuck and I got hurt. Very hurt.
I've always wondering what love feels like, and I think I finally felt it, and it sucks that it didn't work out because I've never felt this way about any guy before. I've never cried over a guy before, until this one. Now I want to distance myself from him, because I've never thought of him as just being my friend, so being around him just as a "friend" would hurt.. and I DON'T KNOW. The last time i thought i was getting over him, I proved myself wrong, because I saw him at a party and my feelings for him blossomed again. I'm so over this situation because I was so hurt and I've never liked anyone so much but I miss him and it's hard. This whole thing has left me emotionally drained. I'm sure some of you can relate right? I hate boys. Throw bricks and sticks at them.
So yeah, this is part of the reason why I've had a brief-ish absence from blogging.. along with the funtastic life of a year 12 student too... That was sarcasm. Haha so.. I PROMISE the next post will not be depressing! I hope you're all having a great weekend! xo
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